To the medical provider who verbally assaulted me while I was making an attempt to save my own life, you have no right being involved with medicine.
Here is a recount of MY experience with YOU as a provider:
I get an appointment in October and I am relieved because I need to see someone NOW, I am in crisis and I know it, I feel validated knowing this because my therapist suggested seeking the help of another medical professional. When I came to the appointment I was nervous because I already have had bad experiences at this place, with providers, and I briefly tried to describe that to you. I let you know that although I understand I am overweight and it contributes, I have been this way for a long time and I think I have a binge eating disorder.
I also remember asking you to focus on the anxiety because that’s what I am here for. Then you start asking me direct questions about the topic I specifically asked you to not talk about with me. You started asking whether or not I drank soda, which I don’t. When I answered you replied “oh really?” tilted your head to the side, squinted your eyes, changed your posture, and the tone in your voice changed. I didn’t know it was that easy to get people to think you’re a liar, but here we are. I tried to ignore this and just move through the appointment, which you spent telling me about how I shouldn’t be eating carbs like bread, pasta and potatoes. Which while am not binging I don’t eat those things because they cause a lot of inflammation in my body and eczema break outs. BUT YOU DON’T KNOW ME.
I came in for another follow up appointment in November and you decided it was in my best interest to make sure I knew that I had gained weight since the last time I had been seen by you. Which is widely inappropriate considering all of my appointments with you were scheduled to talk about ANXIETY. Not about my weight, ESPECIALLY since I believe I am working with an eating disorder and I made you aware of that. At that point I had been in physical therapy, and had some x-rays.
I didn’t get a referral to a psychiatrist until then, when it could have been EASILY provided with the first visit. I also asked for a number during that appointment and you told me that they would contact me. You did mention not being able to extend the disability, which I don’t really care about, the amount of stress I live with every day what can they do to me? But why couldn’t you give me the number in November but in February you can?
What you have done is exacerbated pre-existing undiagnosed PTSD that is also in combination with CPTSD, ADHD, Autism and countless other things that make my life especially hard compared to the “perfectly adjusted and resilient” ANNA MICHELLE.
Oh, yeah, let’s talk about cannabis and how you’re also inappropriate to talk to me about your suspicions about whether or not I am actively using the medication of my own choice. Its 2020/2021. You would not be able to keep you license to practice if you said what you said to me, to someone who was high on a pill you prescribed. I would like to see your perfect life ANNA MICHELLE, the one where you aren’t using something to escape/feel better/sleep/not punch people/ calm your thoughts/reduce panic/pain management.
FYI Cannabis has been prescribed to me by doctors within the Dignity health community because they took the time to talk to me about why I use it and what it helps me with.
You suggested that the entire time I was being seen by you it was my responsibility to contact the psychiatrist, as well as from here on out. You then tell me I should seek counseling.
I believe it would be in your best interest to revert back to the point in time of your life where you learned this word, what it is used for and how to give it to others. Especially when you are acting as a provider with DIGNITY as their name sake.
You’re an awful provider for failing to listen to god knows how many of your “patients”.
With best regards to the rest of your life in your new profession, Christine